alt_susan: (i have to look away)

I'm so sorry. I have been avoiding coming home (or rather, out to Great-Aunt Mina's) but it's not because of anything you've said or done. And I'm sorry you've felt caught between me and Carrie; she's done so much for Mum & Dad. She has every right to be cross with me for not being around.

The thing is, no matter how much Mum & Dad say they don't blame me for just hurts too much to be out at the farm without him to cut the tension and make a joke or something.

I need to be here, working as hard as I can. Not because I'm so vital to the revolution--I'm mostly a pair of hands, and a wand, sometimes a broom--but for me. When all else fails, apply Standard Hufflepuff Coping Methods, eh?

But I'll be there tonight--and yes, I'll write Mum & Dad. I've just...I was up a good half the night fighting and I realised...well, we're doing all this for strategic reasons partly, but also to give all these people who might've lost hope a chance to see their families again, and I miss mine. And once the security situation is better, you and I should go to Scrivenshaft's and get some new drawing supplies, if you want.

Love you, Favourite Youngest Brother.
alt_susan: (everything is grey)
Ugh, whatever Madame P puts in those healing sleep potions is well powerful. I woke up for a minute on account of a bloody earthquake and then went back to sleep apparently.

Still a little fuzzy on how I actually got done here to the greenhouses. That slashing hex must have been worse than I thought.

Hufflepuffs, if you haven't checked in with Professor Siz yet, please do! You may have already heard that one of us was killed in the fighting--Megan Jones. That's true. I wish it weren't.

We want to make sure you're safe.

Ed? Carrie? Peter? It worries me that you're not already here bothering the healers & trying to wake me up. Please check in. Aunt Mina, you too.

I just got word that Mum & Dad are with the mob of parents in Hogsmeade, so you can probably go home soon.
alt_susan: (Default)
Hello everyone,

Neville and Pansy told me all about you last night and I...I don't know quite what to say, except that I'm awfully honoured that you've trusted me with it.

I've got to say, when you both wanted to take a walk round the lake, I suspected something was in the cauldron, but nothing like this. It's bloody amazing is what it is.

So here are my secrets--I hope they're enough.

First of all, my parents don't support the Lord Protector--they raised us on the original Beedle stories, and loads of Muggle literature, and told us all about how things used to be different, as soon as we were old enough to understand them, and to understand that we absolutely could not tell other people ever.

And they told us the real story about my Great-Aunt Amelia--that she was loyal to Dumbledore and especially to the rule of the law and no one person being in charge of things. I think Dad sometimes feels like she should have put the family (and Aunt Mina) first, but he always says that she did what she felt was right in an incredibly difficult situation.

They've never actually done anything officially against the government, except teach us, but even so, Mum could lose her job at the very least if anyone found out. The Ministry probably couldn't do anything to Dad directly, but they could probably lean on the Cannons' owner to sack him or get Mr Bagman to ban him from the pitch. I don't know if it would be enough to get us put into fostering, but it might. I'm sure that's a big part of why Mum and Dad've never risked anything more; well, and they don't approve of violence like those awful Dogstar people.

And if that's not enough of a secret, here's one more:

I found out this summer that my Great-Aunt Amelia and my Aunt Mina were more than just good friends who shared a flat--they were Daughters of Artemis. Sapphists.

I had a long talk with Aunt Mina--it explained so much, and not just about them. About me.

I mean to say...I'm pretty sure I fancy girls.

And boys, too, yeah.
alt_susan: (Default)
It feels odd writing to Mum and Dad right here in the journals, even though I know they can see what I write here and I sometimes write them notes on their journals and all...but this feels different.

Still, I'm glad I lent Valkyrie to the Ministry; it seems like it was the right thing to do. One owl isn't much, but maybe lending her will help the people who are fighting this awful sickness a little bit.


I'm so so glad to hear that everyone at home is safe and not ill; it's hard to be so far away from you even though I know your glad that Eddie and I are here at Hogwarts where nobody has got sick yet. It's for sure a good thing that Eddie's here because he would drive you all mad if he were cooped up in the house all day. At least the Hogwarts grounds are pretty big and we can do flying practice and all. And don't tell me off when you see this Ed because it's true and you know it! With just Peter and Carrie it's probably not so bad, but still I bet they're getting tired of staying in too. I bet your giving them loads of lessons too, Mum, since they can't go to school and you can't go to work.

Here at Hogwarts things are not to different than usual except that nobody can get packages or anything from home and none of the older years can go to Hogsmeade on the week-ends so the castle seems more crowded. Some of the teachers are having everyone who isnt all the way pureblood sit together. I don't blame them for being careful I suppose.

Dad, I'm so sorry you got stuck away from home; I can tell you miss Mum and the little kids loads. But I guess its good that all the halfblood players on the Cannons who couldn't go back to there families because of the travel restrictions have someone to stay with them and take care of things. Have the Healers at St.Mungos told you anything about how Morris is doing? I really hope he gets better.

Carrie and Peter, I wish you two were old enough to have journals of your own so that I could talk to you myself, but I know Mum will show you this. Carrie I heard that Mum is teaching you how to knit and your making a sweater. That's wizard. I was awful at knitting when she tried to teach _me_, so I'm glad there is someone else in the family who can do it. Peter, Mum told me that you are reading whole chapter books all by yourself now! I'm so proud of you! I wish I could see your new drawings too, but maybe you can tell Mum about them and she can tell me.

I have to revise now but I love you all and I think about you all the time.

Love Susan
alt_susan: (Default)
I refuse to write this over in Brown's journal because I haven't got to explain myself to her.  Well, really I haven't got to explain myself to anyone, except grownups.  But all the grownups at Hogwarts already know all about my family and my blood, I think.

It isn't a secret really, I just don't like to bring it up if I don't have to.  But anyone who really wanted to could find out.  About my great-aunt, and about my blood too.  Like I said before, if I really didn't want anyone to ever know, I wouldn't have invited Megan to visit over hols. Maybe my reasons for not talking about it weren't good reasons, or maybe they were, but they didn't have anything to do with wanting to lie or dece desi hide the truth from people.   If you're one of the people I care about, you probably already knew that, though. 

This might seem strange to some people, but being a half-blood (well, almost a quarter blood really) wasn't that important to my life until I came to Hogwarts.  I mean, I always knew it was extra-important to behave and get good marks and keep my he because some people would always be expecting me to do badly, but that was about all.  And it isn't as if I ever even knew any one who knew a Muggle; it was my grandmother on my mum's side who was, you know, and she was ki died years and years ago when my mum was still a little girl. 

People just assumed I was pure, and after awhile it got awkward, trying to think of a time to bring it up.  I mean, when your talking to someone, is there ever a good time to say, "Oh in case you didn't know I'm a half blood."  There isn't.

And I didn't realize how lucky I was, until I came to Hogwarts, and that made it even harder, to say something. Because I felt bad about having things other people didnt have when I wasn't any better than them. That's all I want to say about it and really all that I want to say about anything for awhile. 

It's funny; when I first started Hogwarts I didn't talk to people much until my housemates convinced me to start.  Now I think I should have stuck with not talking to people.

That would make things so much simpler. 

alt_susan: (Default)
The hols have been busy busy busy.  With all my brothers and sisters around it seems like there is always something happening.  We had Christmas dinner with my Auntie Mina at her farm. 

She is a very jolly person and fond of good food and butterbeer, but also good at being quiet and listening.  The rest of the family went back to London on Boxing Day, but I stayed a night at Auntie Mina's by myself.  She always has each of us children out to stay at different times during the year, and it was my turn since I'd been away at school all term. 

Sometimes it is nice to have someone around who is a grownup and not a teacher or your mum or dad.  You can ask questions in a different way and get a different answer.  She told me loads of stories about her school days and I'm not sure I'll ever look at Headmistress McGonagall in quite  and of course I helped with the owls, who are soft and fuzzy and delightful when they aren't trying to nip you. Valkyrie knows better than to do that sort of thing (unless you are bothering her) but these are just young owls that Auntie Mina is training to sell to the Owlery.

Christmas Day was brill of course.  We didnt get loads of presents but the ones we got were wizard.  Mum got me a couple of new books and a nice warm hat that she knitted.  Dad gave me a Pride of Portree poster of Meghan McCormick and a jar of broomstick ointment.  Even though I don't have my own broom he says I can put it on the bristles of the school brooms and it will give them better wind resistance. Eddie, Carrie and Peter got me a comic with their pocket money; it's called Daniel Boone, Cowboy Wizard of the American West and it looks like great fun.  I wrote Peter a story for his present, and drew him a picture, but I figured Carrie and Eddie would like something from a store, so I got Carrie a copy of The Unicorn Girl and Eddie got a new Exploding Snap deck cos he burnt up his last one. 

I can't believe Eddie is going to be at Hogwarts next year!  I've missed him (and Carrie and Peter too, especially Peter--he is my favourite but I try not to let on) but I've also gotten used to being just Susan and not Susan, the Eldest.  I wonder what House he'll go into. 

Megan is coming soon!  I am so excited I can hardly keep it in!  I hope she will like my large mad family and they will like her.  Though I can't imagine why they wouldn't since she is sweet and kind and loads of fun.  But I should probably warn her that they might be a bit much (especially Eddie) after living all her life with an old lady. 


alt_susan: (Default)
Susan Bones

September 2015



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