Order Only: Private Message to Pansy & Sally-Anne

[alt_susan]

Fuck it, I know the work we're doing out here is important--Col. Davidson says it's not only doing the right thing, it's also a strategy to help prevent another war once the Sleepers are fully awakened and the rest of the world realises Britain exists again (now there's a thought to trouble your sleep at night).

But I hate, hate being away from the castle when you lot are still risking your lives. Not that I would have been much use to Justin. Or poor Honoria.

And Sally-Anne, for what it's worth, I'm glad you went.

I feel like there's a better way to put this and I'm too tired to think of it: obviously she's grieving, but has Hydra done anything to suggest she might be going to top herself? I'm not sure it would be fair to stop her if she did, but I hope she knows we care.

I'll be back tonight; I haven't packed a stitch. Heard through the grapevine about your village idea--for now I'll be kipping at Great-Aunt Mina's with the family when I'm not out and around, but I'm in if you want me.

Comments

[alt_sally_anne]

She spent the night in the hospital wing. I imagine they're keeping an eye on her.

I don't think Hydra would kill herself. Dying would be like surrendering to Bellatrix. It would be letting her mother win.

[alt_susan]

Thanks. And I didn't mean to sound like I was intruding on your patch.

It's just--I've heard of situations recently where couples who were really deeply linked went that way. Or tried to.

[alt_pansy]

I think she isn't in immediate danger, but she's going to need us for a good long while.

If you're in, that's a good thing.

She'll need all of us.

[alt_sally_anne]

She won't look at me. Hydra, I mean.

She won't meet my eyes.

[alt_pansy]

I can't imagine all the stuff coming her way that she can't turn off. From all of us.

[alt_sally_anne]

I don't think that's it.

[alt_pansy]

...yeah.

[alt_sally_anne]

When I got to Justin last night the first thing he said to me was, 'did you kill him?'

If he'd been able to choose, when Dolohov wrote to me and said that he and Justin were both going to die, I would have said 'good' and closed my journal. Because it was worth it to him to die if Dolohov died, too.

If he'd lived, I don't know if he'd have ever forgiven me.

I don't know if Hydra's ever going to forgive me for taking that from him.

[alt_pansy]

Every choice you had in front of you was a terrible one.

I'm sorry.

[alt_susan]

Right, what Pansy said.

And you're a Healer; expecting you not to think like a Healer is like, I dunno, expecting a Centaur to sprout wings or something.